D is for Dishwasher

'That bloody dishwasher is broken again.'

'What's wrong with it?'

'We need to get an engineer because it hasn't worked properly for weeks.'

'Dee, just reset it.'

'I have reset it.'

Enter - Dad the engineer. Five seconds later-

'It's working Dee.'

'How did you do that?'

'I reset it, like I told you to do.'

'You didn't tell me to do that.' A moment's reflection.

'Would you like a cup of tea?'

'...Ok.'

Repeat.

B is for The Beginning.. And Bill Murray

I have always said that there is lots of humour in a tragic situation.

I moved home from university just over a year ago. I was and am lucky - I retreated to a house in a lovely area of South West London - a home full of love, a kitchen full of great wine, a fridge full of great food and CD racks full of great music. We have always been a close family, and I've been aware of this since I was a little girl. We always talk, and listen, and make suggestions, as a family, and it's instilled this feeling that I can achieve great things, purely because I have such unflinching support behind me.

Now I am faced with a challenge that I'm entering blind. This safety net has a hole.

My wonderful Mum - the breadwinner, storyteller, carer, advisor - has been a victim of fate. Over the last couple of years, it has become increasingly undeniable - she is descending into the blur of Dementia. Although it's still early days, the change is obvious to me, and I know I will have to watch her slowly slip away from us all.

That great English Actor

But with this bleak situation comes some very funny and poignant moments. Tonight, Brother came home with the new Wes Anderson film, Moonrise Kingdom, to watch after dinner. I love Wes Anderson films, and his latest is no exception (if you haven't already, watch it, it is surprisingly moving). Dee struggles to follow even the simplest of plots nowadays, but there was one thing she was sure about in this film - Bill Murray is English. Undeniably English. No amount of arguing with myself or Father could shift her view - she knew he was English and that was that. Everytime he popped up on screen, she would say 'what a marvellous English actor'. The first couple of times could have been her wicked sense of humour messing with us, but by the twentieth lap of the same conversation, it became clear that this was another 'senior moment' as Father likes to call them. 

It will be things like these that I will document on here, along with anything else that I think will help open up the discussion of mental health to those who may be going through similar circumstances. I was brought up believing that discussion and communication is the best way forward in life, an important lesson from Dee, and this is what I will attempt to do - discuss and communicate my experiences to help myself, and hopefully others along the way.